Couples living separately. One side is like an old waterwheel that keeps turning by the river, with bamboo tubes pouring out water to irrigate the fields next to each other; the other side is like a kite flying in the vast sky. Sometimes they are far away, Sometimes they look like swallows flying back with a light breeze. Home is a beautiful co-constructed vision, we guard the old waterwheel and hold the vague kite string.
The years are unforgiving and you occasionally feel tired. The endless routine of your life is no longer a novelty, and the various constraints of family or work suddenly make you want a warm haven for your soul.
You start to tighten your kite string; you start to call out from afar. You want to share the minutiae and sweetness of every moment of your life with your loved one, who is working hard on his dreams ; you want the encouragement and warmth of love from your family. We both need to do better for each other, yet we don’t understand each other’s emotional needs very well.
You’ve been working in a job with little prospect and have recently considered whether to change to a job that would increase your income, at 35, an age of uncertainty. You leave early and come home late, you still have to look after your children’s lives and schoolwork, and worry about your parents’ health and mood. You only feel a moment of relaxation and authenticity when you take the underground. You don’t share vulnerabilities and complaints with your other half. You wait for your lover to say a word of shushing or virtual joint sharing from afar. The power of words is often underestimated, and in your mind everything may be that simple. It’s not that you can’t understand your partner’s busy schedule, you just can’t bear the thought of being disconnected for long periods of time. You don’t believe that your lover doesn’t have any time to spare, and you gradually become overly concerned about your lover’s replies. How many big things do you think there can be in this world besides life and death? Weak water three thousand only take a dipper to drink, silence makes you suffer.
You are busy at work all day, your career may be on the rise, and the messages from afar always make you feel unrealistically harried. You feel that family is only a small part of your life and you don’t want to reply . You don’t even call from afar for a few days, you want to be alone, you want to do something you think is interesting.
Time slowly allows misunderstandings to arise. You blame your other half for not having a family concept, asking for warmth, chatting at home, cooking a small dish for your family, plain company is happiness, your lover just can’t perceive it; you blame your other half for not being a strong career backer, “chasing after you” all day long, unable to jump through the emotional sound loop, you say this is a kind of spiritual bondage. “The old waterwheel by the river has become a windmill in the paddy fields, and Don Quixote, who is “scarred”, has lost his language.
You are very disappointed; you are aggrieved. You say that love has changed. You say that love has faded. You can’t be alone in your own world, let alone in the world of your lover follow nature. You have no qualms about counting the faults of your other half. No one can understand other side. And other side understands other side. You are stuck in an emotional quagmire for a long time. You stand still and no one wants to take a step forward.
At this point, you decide to shift your focus and take care of your parents and children, or you remain indifferent and continue to work to your heart’s content. You show your happiness in your circle of friends, but you don’t really care how many people follow and like you. You find yourself with a void in your life that needs to be filled. You’ve never been afraid of being alone, but it’s a little frustrating and tedious when the good things are not shared by the people you love most. You hug to yourself late at night, wishing you had someone to drink to quench your thirst for you.
You’re still not used to the distance. Adults should be able to mend themselves. Don’t care that you are a speck of dust, you still have love to build bridges. You are catching in the river of life, you are running on the one-way road, let’s grow into a peach tree.